Tough Love

I feel like a writer again, having brought the most words (1.5k) than I have in weeks to the crit group. Of course, that’s more to be vivisected. The good news is that the win column on this latest bit of my short story seems to be longer than the fail column!

For the Win

  • The story remains “intriguing.”
  • One reader was glad to be able to understand my world’s tech as I’ve written it (she isn’t typically a sci-fi reader). Another appreciated [I’m paraphrasing, here] the lack of technobabble.
  • More praise for my dialogue. One person in particular noted that when characters are asked questions, no one really gets a “direct answer.” Put by another reader, the answers are given “how real people talk.”
  • There “wasn’t a dull place” in the section I brought.
  • Praise for the family dynamics I illustrated between the main character, his sister and his parents.
  • My descriptions about emotional reactions were “sparse” yet “dynamic.”


  • Unclear to some readers “where we’re going from here.” Namely, with regard to an important secondary character’s plans for the protagonist being unnecessarily vague.
  • A couple of lines that need to be rearranged for clarity.
  • A plot point about a lie that didn’t really make sense.

So, maybe on my road trip to Boston, Mass tomorrow, I can at least give some thought to where I’m going from here. ‘Cos hell if I know.