Tough Love

I low-balled my wordcount for yesterday’s critique group crucifixion session again. 820 words. Just couldn’t get the story done, but I did bring something. Better to light an inch than curse the darkness after all, no?

I took bits of the next scene I’d planned and decided to staple it to the end of the scene I brought last time. An obvious decision that you just don’t see when you’re in the midst of a puke draft. Comments were as follows…

Story Win

  • I was a little clearer about the way the tech in this story works.
  • Tension was raised
  • Like last week, readers like the interaction between the protagonist and his sister.
  • I painted a clear picture of the protagonist being a little foolhardy, yet barreling ahead anyway.
  • Hm…I made a note of “Not a lot of words,” but I’ve forgotten what that meant…?

Story Fail

  • Anything involving the color green and computer coding will always say The Matrix.
  • [I’m paraphrasing here] The form of the tech in my story, as I describe it, doesn’t follow the function I describe. Or at least, I’m overcomplicating it.
  • [Edited to add] I evidently don’t know how to spell the singular of lenses.

Thank God for the techies in my group, that’s all I have to say! 🙂